I’ve been cheated on…should I trust him still?..PLS HELP?
My bf and I have been together for 4 yrs. We moved in together last year. He cares for me and tries to provide for me (rent, grocery, even my school tuition money) since I go to work part time and school full time. He tries to cover all our bills like what a husband would do for his wife. He wants me to do well in school too and hands me extra money for my books. I love him for being the caring bf that he is.
The other night he forgot to logged out his email account. I was curious and snooped at his outbox mail messages. I was devastated when I learned he dated a girl for 2 months like 2 yrs ago. They were emailing each other but the girl didnt want none of him since he has a gf (me).. That 2 yrs ago (2006) my bf and I were having a rough patch in our relationship. We fought a lot and would not talk to each other sometimes lasts for a week.
I confronted my bf about the emails. I couldnt talk straight and was crying my heart out. He was mad at first for snooping on his emails and then tried to figure out what to say to me. He explained that nothing happened. That they just went out on 3 dates. In 1 email they painted her condo and watched a movie in her condo afterwards. I asked him if anything happened, he said NO. They just painted, watched a dvd then he left.
One of his emails to her, he asked if they could go out on a romantic date, which i guess she declined because she knew he has a gf.
Im so hurt at what he did. And Im not entirely sure if he was tellling me the truth that nothing happened. When he was explaining himself, he told me that it was like 2 yrs ago and that it was nothing. He even cried afterwards and tried to leave like around 2am because he was ashamed of what he did.
He tells me now that Im the only one in his life and that he plans to marry me and have kids with me. And then promises me that it wont happen again.
Im just devastated. I love him but he broke the trust in the relationship. Should I give him another chance? Another chance to hurt me a second time…
nay
nay
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I would say don’t trust him because he asked his ex to a romantic date
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aww, i’m so sorry. what he did was awful, and he obviously knows that.
but i think he really does care for you, a lot. it seems like he is sorry and sounds like a wonderful guy, other than the cheating. tell him that you dont know if you’re okay with staying with him, after what he did. tell him that you are devestated and that you are scared to give him another chance. that’s what love is, though. loving someone just means they can hurt you easily, but thats the way a pessimist would talk (sorry about that).
I know exactly how you feel, when you feel betrayed that someone would do something like that to you.
i think you should forgive him, but make sure he knows how you feel. make him grovel at your knees just to get you back to change your mind. make him tell you he is horrible and he’d never ever do it again. he needs to get the worst side of this, because he hurt you, and that is NOT okay.
i am so sorry, i know it is so hard to go through this kind of thing. and that is why a lot of people are afraid to love: because when you actually start to like someone that much, it means they can hurt you. and some people dont want to take that risk. but most guys learn after this kind of thing. when he sees that you are serious that you dont know about a second chance, he would never make that mistake again.
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