Should I belive in my husband when he says he can beat his cocain addiction?
My husband has a real bad cocain addiction.He can’t even go 2days with out.I found out and had him leave about 3weeks ago,but I let him come up on weekends and see the kids and I talk to him on the pone.Last weekend when he came he stole 50dollars wich was my pone bill and he knew that and then this weekend he stole all my dvd’s and 15dollars.Should I stop him from seeing the kids.He is straight when he comes.I have tryed to get him into rehab but he says its not that bad.This last weekend I caught him snorting a pill on my kitchen counter and when I got upset about it he started chokeing me.He is my husband and I want to help him but I’ve never been around anyone on them.I just don’t know when to call it quits.I don’t understand how he can do this to us or his self.I feel so stupid and ashamed about all this I realy don’t have any one to talk to.I told him he can’t come over and see the kids anymore do you think I’M RIGHT.Or should i still try to help him??????
Do whatever it takes to make him accountable for his actions, up to and including calling the police for his abusing you. i have been sober for over 13 years and until everyone in my life turned away from me i didn’t see how bad my alcoholism was. He needs to get better for the sake of the children, but especally for the sake of his own life and soul.
March 11th, 2010 at 7:58 am
Do whatever it takes to make him accountable for his actions, up to and including calling the police for his abusing you. i have been sober for over 13 years and until everyone in my life turned away from me i didn’t see how bad my alcoholism was. He needs to get better for the sake of the children, but especally for the sake of his own life and soul.
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March 11th, 2010 at 8:46 am
I think your doing the right thing by not letting him see the kids right now. He is obviously on a downward spiral and is going to drag you down with him if you let him. He is a drug addict and trust me, he cant get better on his own. He needs the help of professionals. A normal, non drug using man does not steal money or belongings from his family. He is stealing because he needs the drug. Drug addicts get physically ill if they go without the drug, thats where rehab comes into play. They can slowly ween him off. Do you and your children a huge favor….have no contact with him unless he is asking for a ride to your local rehab center. Change the locks on the doors, make sure all windows are locked and change your phone number if need be. He has no place in your family unless he is clean and sober. That is unless you want to lose everything.
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March 11th, 2010 at 9:33 am
It depends on how strong his will is. I have a lot of drug users in my family, and most of them say they don’t have a problem. If he admitted to having an addiction. He has a better chance of getting through it. So i say give it a little bit of time to see if he tries, but don’t let him go on forever telling you the same thing. GOOD LUCK!!!!
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March 11th, 2010 at 9:44 am
This guy is a full-on addict, a thief, and a violent abuser. And you’re wondering if it might be time to protect yourself and your children from the destructive effects of having him in your lives? I’d say it is!
If someone finds out he is doing drugs at your house, with your kids in the house at the time, you can kiss your kids goodbye. Is he worth risking that?
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March 11th, 2010 at 9:49 am
Please, stay away from him and keep him away from your children. He needs help. Right now he doesn’t want it and it’s hard to say if he ever will. The best thing you can do right now is talk to a counselor about these problems. It is hard, I know, but the fact that he has tried to choke you ,which indicates that he is capable of severely harming you and possibly your children. In your local phone book there are probably phone #’s you can call and find further help….Good Luck.
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March 11th, 2010 at 10:26 am
if he is stealing from u, and abusing u, he hasn’t beaten the addiction yet, u would be a fool to let this man back into your life, or home. he can do this because he is selfish, and the drug has complete control over him, and nothing else matters to him. distance would be smart. he has no self respect, and if u keep him he will pull u down with him.
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March 11th, 2010 at 10:47 am
Yes, you are going to have to keep him away from you and the children. People on drugs have to want to help themselves, and unfortunately that usually comes after hitting rock bottom. Right now he is using you to pay for his drug habit by stealing from you. He has choked you? What is next? Will he harm you further or the children? It is not worth the risk. Can you call someone in his family? Maybe they can help in this situation.
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March 11th, 2010 at 11:16 am
My now ex-husband and father of my 2 children still has a cocaine addiction and it’s been almost 4 yrs. It was the reason i left thinking it would make him realize he had a problem, but it gave him more freedom to do so. we were married for 12 yrs. he lost our house and our property, his job of 13 yrs and most of his family because of all the lies. He has lost so much stuff in the pawn shop and sold alot too. I want him to go to rehab but he says he doesn’t have a problem. He never use to raise a hand to me until i left, and he never thought twice about since, so i just avoid the situation and don’t go around him and don’t let the kids go either cause if he can do it that easy with me it scares me what he could do to the kids. See, he doesnt remember half of what hes done half the time until the next day or someone tells him what hes done and im not comfortable with that. my kids come first and as your seeing they don’t with him like they use to, if they did he wouldnt be still money from you which is like taking food from your kids mouth. Good luck
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March 11th, 2010 at 11:54 am
I think you’re right not to let him around your kids, and while you can’t force him to seek help, you could report him to the authorities for physically harming you and snorting drugs off your counter and stealing you money and belongings.
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March 11th, 2010 at 12:37 pm
omg!!!! u needd to leave him!!!stop letting him see the kids he might even take the kids when ur not around!!! he just trying to use u… stop.. and think.. u are not goinjg to put up with this crap.. believe in ur self.. and pray!! divorce him… hes on drugs thats really gonna mess um up.. i know u still love him., but he choked u.. is it worth it???
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March 11th, 2010 at 12:59 pm
I wouldn’t trust him.
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